Angel



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Angel: I had to sing Barry Manilow.
Faith: You're kidding.
Angel: In front of people....
Faith: And here I am talking about my petty little problems.
Angel: Just wanted to give you a little perspective.
Faith: "Copacabana"?
Angel: "Mandy". I don't wanna dwell on it...
--"Angel" (WB)



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Angel: What are you cooking?
Fred: I've been trying to make an enchilada out of tree bark.
Angel: Bark enchiladas. Huh...How's that going?
Fred: There is work to be done.
--"Angel" (WB)



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Angel: She asked me to breakfast.
Wesley: Breakfast. Right. How did you respond?
Angel: Well . . . of course I ignored it completely, changed the subject, and locked her in a cage...
--"Angel" (WB)



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Cordelia: I'm not telling your sixteen-year-old boy that.
Angel: Well, someone has to make sure he knows the facts of life. My track record with the whole man/woman thing isn't, you know I don't wanna use the words 'tragic farce' but...
--"Angel" (WB)



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Angel: I don't remember what it was like. Being human. It was too long ago.
Harmony: Not so great. Zits. Dandruff. Mortality...
--"Angel" (WB)



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Angel: [to Doyle] Where'd you pick up computer skills?
Cordelia: Downloading pictures of naked women?
Doyle: Well, that's more or less accurate...
--"Angel" (WB)



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Angel: The lab is doing some blood work.
Fred: I'm a mummy, aren't I...
Spike: I've fought plenty of mummies, and none of 'em were as pretty as you. Almost none.
--"Angel" (WB)



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Wesley: I don't know. I think I sort of missed this. You and me and the books, "kickin' it old school," as they say...
[He winces.]
And I never will again....
--"Angel" (WB)



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Illyria: Your breed is fragile: how is it they came to control this world?
Knox: Opposable thumbs. Um, fire. Television. What they lack in strength, they make up for in extraordinary sneakiness....
--"Angel" (WB)



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Vail: Did you kill all of my guards?
Angel: All the ones I could find....
--"Angel" (WB)



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Angel: You just like stabbing me.
Spike: I'm shocked - shocked! - that you'd say that. I much prefer hitting you with blunt instruments.
--"Angel" (WB)



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Archduke Sebassis: The circle does not abide secrets.
Angel: Which is interesting for a secret society.
--"Angel" (WB)



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Lindsey: It's a secret society.
Gunn: Never heard of them.
Lindsey: That's because they're secret...
--"Angel" (WB)



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Lindsey: If you want me, I'm on your team.
Angel: I want you, Lindsey . . . I'm thinking about rephrasing that.
Lindsey: Yeah, I think I'd be more comfortable if you did.
--"Angel" (WB)



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Illyria: I will fight. I've been broken and humiliated. I will return in kind every blow, every sting. I will shred my adversaries. Pull their eyes out just enough to turn them towards their mewing, mutilated faces.
Wesley: You're a very inspirational person. Have I mentioned that?
--"Angel" (WB)



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Lilah: Mind if I join you?
Wesley: On many levels and with great intensity.
--"Angel" (WB)



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Lilah: Don't be thinking about me when I'm gone.
Wesley: I wasn't thinking about you when you were here...
--"Angel" (WB)



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Cordelia: Well, how hard could she be to find...did she mention anything?
Angel: She said she was staying with a friend.
Cordelia: Well, that narrows it down to people with friends....Where do we keep that list?
--"Angel" (WB)



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Fred: Looks like we've been following Angel's son's emissions the whole time.
Gunn: Now there is a sentence I don't ever need to hear again.
--"Angel" (WB)



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Angel: I don't even own a TV. He's gonna wanna watch TV. Not too much, I mean, after homework and chores. He's gonna need clothes, weekly allowance... What's good nowadays? Fifty cents, a dollar?
Cordy: Yeah. If you're Tom Sawyer painting the fence.
--"Angel" (WB)



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(As the demon horde approaches.)
Spike: In terms of a plan?
Angel: We fight.
Spike: Bit more specific?
Angel: Well, personally, I kind of want to slay the dragon. Let's go to work.
--"Angel" (WB)

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Angel: If nothing we do matters, then all that matters is what we do...

--"Angel" (WB)